My Soul Will Have to Wait...

Pernil­la and Mari­ka all grown up.

Decem­ber 12, 2012

-Motor­cy­cle acci­dent huh?
-Nurse huh?
She was attrac­tive, dark-haired, thir­ty-some­thing, and stand­ing right next to me at the crowd­ed bar in Tran­syl­va­nia, yet I hadn’t noticed her until she spoke. My reply was based on expe­ri­ence; women who know how I lost my arm before I tell them are always nurses.

- Nope, doc­tor, Chief of Surgery actu­al­ly.
- That would explain it too.
- Healthy one-armed guy with tat­toos and a scar on his spine… doesn’t take a psy­chic.
- Not a psy­chic, just a Chief of Surgery… or a nurse.

I smiled and so did she. Then I spun around to relate the exchange to my curi­ous Roman­ian friends, but when I spun back she was gone. I’d been reduced to a med­ical sta­tis­tic and pos­si­bly missed out on an inter­est­ing date. The sto­ry of my life these days — too lit­tle time to meet good women, then when I do I drop the ball.

I’m liv­ing right on Venice Beach now with my amaz­ing daugh­ter Mari­ka; it’s like get­ting a sec­ond shot at life. Our Bug­gy is the coolest car in Los Ange­les. And Radical.FM has just released our full-blown ser­vice in Swe­den and a lim­it­ed ver­sion world­wide. But I work a lot of 15 hour days and live in a con­stant state of jet-lag between LA, New York, Swe­den, Roma­nia, and SE Asia. I rarely know what time zone I’m in, nev­er mind what’s cool in a giv­en soci­ety or situation.

Yoshiko is in Japan with a new life, but we still chat occa­sion­al­ly. She has no tol­er­ance for my com­plaints and says I’m spoiled to have a fas­ci­nat­ing job and two amaz­ing daugh­ters, and that’s true enough. She also says I’m sin­gle by choice, and that I’ll find love as soon as I’m ready. I hope she’s right there, because I’ve ‘felt’ ready for a while. She means that I pri­or­i­tize Rad­i­cal over a love life, and she should know. In fact I’m so busy that I haven’t had time to update Red­bug­gy in over a year; my apologies.

And in all that time my dis­trib­u­tors have still not secured a deal for Adven­turess Want­ed. As an artist my great­est fear is not star­va­tion but obscu­ri­ty — that my work will not be seen. That would be an insult to every­one involved with this movie, so I’ve decid­ed to self-dis­trib­ute. Inter­net is chang­ing the way cre­ative works can find an audi­ence. Some blog­gers devel­op big­ger fol­low­ings than estab­lished jour­nal­ists. Tal­ent­ed inde­pen­dent musi­cians are gain­ing trac­tion with­out label sup­port. And at least occa­sion­al­ly, Indie Film­mak­ers find recog­ni­tion with­out stu­dio backing.

I’m work­ing hard to make Radical.FM the most excit­ing music ser­vice in the world. If I suc­ceed I’ll make more mon­ey than I need, so I’m becom­ing phil­an­thropic; with every­thing I’ve seen in life I want to start giv­ing back. But I’m not rich yet, so I have to start small. To pro­mote the arts I’ve decid­ed to release Adven­turess Want­ed as a User Sup­port­ed exper­i­ment. We’ve just set up qual­i­ty down­loads from this site, and we’ll let peo­ple dis­trib­ute it as they see fit – so go for it, and spread the word! It’s water­marked for dona­tions and we’ve added a Pay­Pal Dona­tions page as well. And if the film gen­er­ates any mon­ey we’ll start a fund for The African Acad­e­my of Gift­ed Girls which I will get around to build­ing after I’ve moved on from Radical…

And had a very LONG vacation.

Until then dreams of beau­ti­ful women, pro­fes­sion­al suc­cess­es, and being near my daugh­ters, will have to keep me strong through gru­el­ing hours and sleep­less travels.

Music helps too, and Mari­ka has intro­duced me to sev­er­al songs I’d like­ly have missed if she were not back in my dai­ly life. Recent­ly she turned me on to “San­te­ria” by Sub­lime. We were sure we had dis­cov­ered the next big hit as we blast­ed it repeat­ed­ly on Radical.FM until the neigh­bors com­plained. But it turns out the song is twen­ty years old and was a big hit here in California.

Who knew in Sweden?

“San­te­ria” is my all-time favorite song of the moment and its cho­rus sums up my existence:

What I real­ly want to know, mila­dy,
What I real­ly want to say I can’t define.
Well its love that I need,
But my soul will have to wait…

But you don’t have to wait anoth­er minute to see “Adven­turess Wanted”!

Down­load the entire 90 minute award win­ning film imme­di­ate­ly right here! And while my lone­ly soul waits impatiently…

Enjoy the film, and enjoy very Hap­py Holidays!